Are you and your partner trying to conceive but you can’t tell pregnancy myths from the facts? I did some research to help separate the useful information from bogus stuff that doesn’t really work.
What kind of pregnancy myths are there out there? When it comes to conception, pregnancy, and fertility there are all kinds of old wives’ tales and other information out there that proves not to be true. Some of these ideas relate to what will help you conceive, some relate to what will prevent you from conceiving, and some even claim to be able to tell you if you’re going to have a boy or a girl.
I’ve taken a good hard look at all of the information I could find out there about getting pregnant. And I’ve broken down the actually helpful information to separate it from the not-so-helpful.
After reading this article, you should have a good idea of what things will actually help you get pregnant, and which are just stories.
Disclaimer: This blog post contains a lot of sexual and potentially NSFW (not safe for work) language regarding conception and pregnancy.
Myths About Getting Pregnant
There are so many more myths when it comes to pregnancy than I could have ever imagined.
It’s easy to see where some of them come from because they make sense on face value. But others are just weird and sometimes funny. The latter are probably things that people have been passing down for hundreds of years without really questioning them.
It’s easy to see why people would cling to any information about pregnancy that they thought would help. There’s a lot on the line when you’re trying to start your family.
Plus trying to conceive is such a complicated process that takes place over a long period of time, so it’s hard to separate what’s actually helpful from things that are just coincedences.
But without further ado, here is a huge list of myths about getting pregnant…
MYTH – Having An Orgasm Helps A Woman Get Pregnant
Some people think that a female orgasm helps improve your odds of pregnancy by sucking up the sperm deeper inside by the contracting uterus. But there’s been no proven correlation between orgasms and an increase in your chances of conceiving.
Some animals don’t ovulate on a cycle like humans and do need an orgasm to trigger ovulation, but humans aren’t one of them. Animals that do work this way include camels, cats, ferrets, and rabbits.
MYTH – You Should Have Sex Every Day When Trying To Conceive
Studies have found no difference in pregnancy rates between couples who had sex every day compared to those who had sex every other day prior to ovulation.
Forcing yourselves to have sex every single day can lead to extra stress for both of you.
A woman can only get pregnant in the few days leading up to ovulation and during it. So extra sex during the rest of the month won’t boost your odds of conceiving.
Ovulation happens about 14 days after your next period starts. So ideally you want to have sex every two or three days starting from 18 days before your next period.
MYTH – Ovulation Kits Are A Foolproof Way To Know When To Start Trying
Ovulation kits can help a woman track her cycle. It does this by testing how much luteinizing hormone your body is producing, which a woman’s body releases before ovulation.
But the test can only detect when you’re SUPPOSED to be ovulating, not if any ovulation is actually occuring.
MYTH – Your Partner Should Lay In Bed With Her Legs Up For 30 Minutes After Sex
It makes logical sense that gravity will help your little guys get to their destination faster and easier. But it doesn’t actually make a difference.
Sperm start swimming up toward the egg immediately after ejaculation. A woman putting her legs up doesn’t help or make any difference.
It might seem like all of the sperm are leaking out if she immediately stands up. But the vast majority of this is just seminal fluid, which is made up of fructose and enzymes to help the sperm survive until it’s time for them to do their job.
MYTH – Cough Medicine Can Help You Conceive
A couple years ago there was a big theory going around that taking cough syrup with a mucus-thinning ingredient called guaifenesin could improve your chances of pregnancy. Guaifenesin is used to thin mucus to help with stuffed up noses when you’re sick, but won’t help you get pregnant.
The idea behind this myth is that the ingredient will thin your cervical mucus and make it less hostile toward sperm. But in fact, medication used to treat infertility usually causes this mucus to thicken!
MYTH – Even If She’s 35, She Still Has Lots of Time
A woman’s fertility starts to decrease around age 27 or 28. By 35 things start to get iffy.
Once a woman reaches 40, her chance of getting pregnant each cycle drops to only 5%!
But being under 35 is no guarantee either.
MYTH – She Has A Regular Period, So She’s Fine
Having an irregular cycle can make it hard to time conception. But just because her period runs like clockwork doesn’t guarantee it will be easy to conceive.
If she has a light period, it might be a sign her body isn’t producing enough estrogen.
And if her period is very heavy, she might not have enough progesterone to balance out her estrogen.
There are many factors besides regular menstruation that affect a woman’s ability to conceive. Including conditions like endometriosis (very painful periods can be a sign), diabetes, thyroid disorders, polycystic ovary syndrome, and being obese or underweight. As well as nicotine, caffeine, and alcohol consumption.
MYTH – Only Have Sex If She Ovulates on Day 14
Your partner being early is helpful if you’re trying to get pregnant. But you should start having sex a few days before ovulation (like Day 11) since sperm can hang out in her cervix for 72 hours before the egg arrives.
If your partner is waiting for her basal temperature to rise before you have sex, she will already have ovulated and missed the best opportunity to conceive. An unfertilized egg only lives about 12 to 24 hours if it isn’t fertilized.
MYTH – Being On The Pill For A Long Time Will Delay Her Pregnancy
It doesn’t take forever for a woman’s hormones to adjust back to normal after she stops taking the pill or other hormone-based contraceptives like implants or IUDs. Some women’s fertility will return to normal as soon as they stop.
Others will take about a month to start ovulating again.
But if you’ve been trying to conceive without luck for years, it’s probably not the fault of your partner previously taking the pill.
80% of women trying to get pregnant conceive within 1 year of stopping the pill, which is the same rate expected for women who haven’t been on birth control.
The pill decreases a woman’s risk of ovarian and uterine cancer, which might help keep her fertile longer.
MYTH – Men Should Wear Boxers Instead of Briefs When Trying To Conceive
It’s true that your sperm production decreases when your testicles are overheated. Whether that’s from wearing tight underwear, being in a hot tub or sauna, or anything else that warms them up.
But studies in recent years have shown that underwear choice doesn’t make enough of an impact to affect male fertility.
Not sure what kind of underwear your baby should wear? Check out my cloth diaper guide.
MYTH – Ice Packs Increase Male Fertility
Sperm counts do rise in cool temperatures. But it takes at least 2 months for cool temperatures to begin having an affect on a man’s sperm count, so this isn’t very practical. Applying an ice pack to your junk just before sex won’t make a difference.
MYTH – The Egg Can Be Fertilized For Up To 2 Days After It’s Released
Sperm are perfectly capable of hanging out in the acidic environment of a woman’s reproductive system for three days or more. But an egg only has a shelf life of 1 day at most.
MYTH – Sex Position Matters
Many people say the missionary position is best for conceiving. This is mostly a myth. Healthy sperm can do their job no matter what position they start from, as long as you ejaculate inside.
Sex that involves deeper penetration MIGHT help get sperm closer to your partner’s cervix and improve the chances of fertilization. But that’s just a theory and hasn’t been fully studied yet.
MYTH – Saliva Is A Better Lubricant Than Synthetic Lubricants When Conceiving
You’d think that saliva would be less damaging than store-bought lubricants since it’s a natural bodily fluid. But saliva can kill sperm. After all, it contains enzymes that start breaking down food long before they reach your stomach.
The truth is that most lubricants are harmful to your chances of conception. That goes for massage oils as well. So it’s best to just avoid using them when trying to make a baby.
MYTH – Something Is Wrong If You Can’t Conceive Within 3 Months
Getting pregnant isn’t something that happens overnight. There’s a chance you could get lucky and your egg and sperm could meet on the very first attempt. The average time to conceive is less than three months with well-timed sex. But it’s perfectly normal for the average couple to take a full 12 months before finally conceiving and doesn’t mean you necessarily have any kind of fertility problems. You might just be unlucky.
If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.
MYTH – Men Haven’t Got A Biological Clock
Men’s biological clock usually runs a lot longer than a woman’s, but we’ve still got one.
As a man ages, his testosterone levels naturally decrease. This decreases your sperm in both quality and quantity.
MYTH – Only Women Need To Stop Drinking When Trying To Conceive
Women should definitely cut alcohol out once they start trying because it can really mess with their cycle. But men need to cut back or cut out alcohol as well. Alcohol can lower testosterone which messes with sperm production.
MYTH – Women Can Drink All The Caffeine They Want Until They Actually Get Pregnant
Just like alcohol, caffeine can mess with a woman’s fertility too.
Heavy caffeine use is also linked to early miscarriages.
So it’s time for your partner to cut back on those cappucinos. Women trying to get pregnant should consume no more than 200-300 mg of caffine per day. About 2-4 shots of espresso or 12-24 ounces of brewed coffee. That’s the same amount allowed once she’s pregnant.
MYTH – Breastfeeding Prevents Another Pregnancy
Breastfeeding can delay your period from returning, but it’s not good to rely on it as a form of birth control.
There’s still more than a 1% chance of conceiving even if you’re breastfeeding.
Your doctor can suggest a form of birth control that’s suitable while breastfeeding if you want to avoid getting pregnant again right away.
MYTH – Green Tea Will Help A Women Get Pregnant
The known benefits of green tea are pretty much canceled out by its drawbacks.
Green tea is chocked full of antioxidants which might increase the viability of your eggs. But drinking it also decreases the effectiveness of folic acid in your body, which is something a fetus needs to develop properly.
If you love your green tea, try to only have one cup a day. And be sure to take a pre-natal vitamin containing folic acid along with it.
MYTH – Worrying Affects A Woman’s Ability To Get Pregnant
Extreme stress can affect ovulation, but we’re talking something really traumatic like living in a war zone.
There’s no evidence or studies to suggest that normal levels of stress will hurt your chances of conceiving.
This myth probably comes from stories of infertile couples who adopted and then got pregnant right away allegedly because they’d stopped stressing about it.
MYTH – When You Have Sex Determines Your Baby’s Gender
An old wives’ tale says that if you have sex early before ovulation you’ll have a boy. And if you have sex later (closer) before ovulation you’ll have a girl.
The theory is that boy sperm (with Y chromosomes) swim faster but don’t live as long, while girl sperm (with X chromosomes) are slower but live longer.
Scientific studies suggest that timing has no influence on your unborn baby’s gender.
Other old wives’ tales suggest that the gender of your baby can be influenced by the phase of the moon, certain positions, facing certain directions, the way the wind is blowing, or having sex during different seasons too. There’s no science behind any of them, but a lot of parents experiencing confirmation bias who swear by them.
MYTH – Men Should Save Up Their Sperm For The Ovulation Window
Saving up your sperm doesn’t mean you’ll have more of them or that they’ll be any more effective.
It’s actually the opposite. Not regularly ejaculating can decrease the quality of your sperm. If they hang around too long (5 – 10 days) they start to die off. Weak and old sperm can actually form a barrier that prevents healthier new sperm from reaching the egg.
Fertility specialists suggest having sex or ejaculating every day or every other day to make sure you have fresh sperm.
MYTH – Certain Diets Affect The Sex Of Your Child
There’s a whole bunch of different myths about foods affecting the sex of your baby. If you listen to them all, you’d think that any given food guarantees your baby being both male and female.
The most common ones are that a high salt diet will result in a boy, and a high dairy diet will result in a girl. Neither is true. It all comes down to which sperm fertilizes the egg first.
MYTH – Women Can’t Get Pregnant On Their Period
It’s really rare that a woman would get pregnant on her period unless she ovulates very early. But under ideal conditions sperm can live up to 9 days, so if you have sex toward the end of her period it’s possible.
MYTH – You Can’t Conceive If You Pull Out
This is some high school health class level stuff, but withdrawal isn’t an effective form of birth control. A man starts releasing pre-ejaculatory liquid just by being erect, and it’s very much still full of sperm.
About 25% of women who rely on withdrawal as their only form of birth control over the course of a year will still get pregnant.
MYTH – You’re More Likely To Conceive During The Day
Some people say that you’ll have better luck conceiving during the day or with the lights on.
Men do have higher levels of testosterone and higher sperm counts in the morning. But there’s no evidence that this is enough to improve your rate of conception.
MYTH – Bananas Can Make Men Sterile
There was a report many years ago that said chemicals used to grow bananas can decrease the sperm count of banana farm workers. But even if it’s true, it’s likely only workers who are exposed to the chemical every day who will suffer ill effects.
There’s no evidence that just eating bananas can negatively affect a man’s sperm levels or quality. Besides, you peel off the protective outer layer of the banana when you eat it.
MYTH – Swallowing Semen Makes Women More Fertile
Whatever guy first convinced his wife of this was pretty creative. But no studies so far have shown that swallowing semen makes women more fertile.
It does contain a lot of protein though.
MYTH – Eating Yams Will Cause Twins
One specific village in Africa has the highest rate of twins birth in the world. Apparently they also eat a ton of yams, so people think the two things might be linked.
One Yale student did a study that seems to suggest that yams can increase fertility, but the study hasn’t been replicated or officially proven yet.
I’m saying this one is a myth. But if you’re optimistic, we can say this one is “inconclusive.” And even if it’s true, you’d need to eat a LOT of them.
MYTH – Women Shouldn’t Exercise While Trying To Conceive
Exercise is healthy and doesn’t affect a woman’s ability to conceive.
Even late into pregnancy, exercise is perfectly fine. I know women who have exercised, swam, and even played hockey during pregnancy and their babies were fine.
MYTH – Sneezing Prevents Pregnancy
I guess the idea behind this one is that since a sneeze is so powerful and causes most of your muscles to tighten up, it must be able to squeeze and expel semen from inside your partner.
Sneezing might get some of the seminal fluid out, but even the strongest sneeze isn’t enough to shake out all the sperm that are already on their way up.
Facts About Getting Pregnant
Okay, so now we know there are a whole lot of things people believe about getting pregnant that aren’t really true. But what do we actually know about conception?
Here are some scientifically researched and studied facts.
FACT – Vitamin D Deficiency Might Hurt Your Fertility
The majority of Canadians and those who live in the upper half of the United States are deficient in Vitamin D.
Health Canada recommends that adults get at least 600 IUs of Vitamin D every day. Some people might need even more, as high as 5,000 IUs per day!
Talk to your doctor to see where your levels are at and how much Vitamin D you and your partner should be supplementing. You can get your current Vitamin D levels with a simple blood test.
FACT – Your Diet Affects Fertility
Low-fat dairy products have been linked to infertility. Carbs and sugars also hurt conception since they need high amounts of insulin, which can disrupt the balance of hormones in your body.
Avoid unhealthy foods and try to eat as many whole foods as possible. Stuff like vegetables, fruit, low proteins like fish and chicken, healthy fats, seeds, nuts, and legumes. Eating organic may be helpful since you’ll avoid chemicals like pesticides and herbicides which can also disrupt your hormones.
Want to eat healthy and save money too? Check out my article on how gardening can help save you money on your grocery bill.
FACT – Get Your Partner’s Thyroid Checked
Having an underactive thyroid can stop a woman from getting pregnant and also increases the risk of a miscarrige.
FACT – Folic Acid Is Important
Folic acid (vitamin B9) has a number of benefits for expecting mothers. But perhaps most important is to prevent neural tube defects, which are a group of birth defects that affect the spine (like spina bifida) and brain (like anencephaly.)
If you’ve used genetic testing and analysis services like 23andme, you should check your results to make sure you don’t have a mutation on your MTHFR gene. About 40% of people worldwide have this mutation and it can affect your body’s ability to absorb folic acid in it’s most common form by as much as 70%.
If you do find that you have this mutation, you’ll want to supplement with a special form of folate supplement called L-5-MTHF (L-5-methyltetrahydrofoldate.) This is a biologically active form of folate that your body can metabolize even if you have an MTHFR mutation.
If all of these medical words sound overwhelming, that’s okay. You should check with your doctor to make sure you’re taking the right amount and type of folic acid anyway.
FACT – Laptops Can Lower A Man’s Sperm Count
If you place a laptop on your lap, all of that heat from your computer is being transferred straight to your testicles which can lower fertility. Especially if you’re using a laptop this way for hours each day.
You can easily prevent this by putting your laptop onto a table and using it like a desktop instead.
While not conclusively studied yet, the same might also be true for cell phones. So it might be best to keep your phone out of your pocket as much as possible, just to be safe.
FACT – Romantic Movies Can Help You Get Pregnant
Sorry guys. But studies have shown that watching romantic movies can increase a woman’s levels of progesterone, which helps regulate their cycles. So it looks like you might be stuck watching The Notebook again.
FACT – Eating Oysters Can Help Get You Pregnant
Oysters are considered an aphrodesiac and libido booster. They’re also one of nature’s most concentrated forms of zinc, which both men and women need for optimum fertility.
Once she’s pregnant you should cut out the oysters though. Eating raw or undercooked seafood can cause serious bacterial infections like Listeriosis.
FACT – The Longer You Take To Get Pregnant, The More Likely It Is To Be A Boy
This one is SORT OF true. Usually women who take longer to conceive have a thicker cervical mucus. This puts Y chromosome (boy) sperm at an advantage.
Scientists aren’t exactly sure why yet. But one of the leading suggestions is that boy sperm contain less DNA. This makes them lighter and better at swimming more quickly.
FACT – Taking Pregnancy Tests In The Morning Is Best
A pregnancy test can give you a positive result any time of the day. But the longer it’s been since you’ve drank or peed, the more concentrated your urine will be.
More concentrated urine means that pregnancy hormones in your urine will also be more concentrated, so you’re more likely to get a positive result earlier.
FACT – A Woman’s Sense Of Smell Increases When Ovulating
If your wife complains that you smell, it might be a sign that you need a shower. But it also might be a sign that she’s ovulating!
When your partner says she’s been smelling weird smells all day or that your cooking is too fragrant, it’s a good sign that it’s time to start making babies.
FACT – Clean Teeth Help With Pregnancy Too
Having a clean mouth helps at all stages of pregnancy.
Poor oral hygeine can affect a guy’s sperm rate. Gum disease can also cause a woman to deliver her baby prematurely or to have a baby with a low birth rate.
If you or your partner hasn’t been to the dentist in a while, it’s time to make an appointment and start flossing again.
FACT – Women Are Sexier When They’re Ovulating
British researchers did a study where they showed men photos of women and asked them to say which they thought were the most beautiful.
The men overwhelmingly picked women who were ovulating.
The most obvious reasons are because ovulation dilates a woman’s pupils, makes her lips fuller, and softens her skin tone. For some reason, women also subconsciously tend to dress sexier in the middle of their cycle.
FACT – Watching Porn Might Make Your Sperm More Powerful
For real though. One piece of research shows that men produce stronger and more resilient sperm after they watch heterosexual porn. Although the sample size for that particular study was quite small, so take it with a grain of salt.
Still, while your partner has an excuse to watch more romantic movies, you might have one to watch something a bit more X-rated.
FACT – Overall Health Isn’t Necessarily A Sign You’re Fertile
Being unhealthy obviously makes conceiving even harder. 12% of infertility cases are due to weight issues.
But even 1 in 10 healthy couples of reproductive age who exercise regularly, have good blood pressure and cholesterol levels, and eat a healthy diet will still face fertility problems.
More Weird Baby Gender Prediction Myths
I touched earlier on some myths and old wive’s tales that people previously believed about your baby’s gender. Here are some more totally-not-true things that people believe about your baby’s gender.
Your wife is more likely to be carrying a boy if:
- She’s carrying low
- If you ask her to show her hands and she naturally shows them facing down
- She’s “blooming” (everyone says she’s glowing and her skin and hair seem like they’ve improved)
- The baby’s heartbeat is less than 140 bpm
- Your previous child’s first word was “dada”
- Her urine is bright yellow (she might also be dehydrated)
- She eats garlic and you can smell it coming out of her pores
- If you add together the number of the month she conceived and her age at the time of conception and the number you get is even (what?)
- Her pillow faces North while she sleeps
- She sleeps on her left side
- The baby has a sloping forehead or square lower jaw in ultrasounds (this is called skull theory)
- She craves protein or salt-filled foods like meat and cheese
- She was more aggressive or dominant during love-making when the child was conceived
- She didn’t have morning sickness during the first trimester
- Her feet become cold more quickly than before pregnancy
- She’s having more headaches than usual
- If she ties her wedding ring to a string and hangs it over her stomach it, it moves in circles
- Her skin is dry
- Her right breast looks bigger than the left
- The hair on her legs is growing faster
Your wife is more likely to be carrying a girl if…
- Pretty much the opposite of the boy things
- The baby’s heartbeat is faster than 140 bmp
- She didn’t have a blooming period at all
- She has excessive morning sickness
- You’re gaining sympathy weight alongside her
- Her urine is a dull yellow color
- If she eats garlic and doesn’t smell like it
- Her left breast is bigger than the right
- She lies on her right side when sleeping
- She’s more moody than normal
- Your previous child’s first word was “mama”
- She shows her hands palm up when asked to present them
- In ultrasounds, the baby’s lower jaw is more rounded and the top of their head is tapered
- If she looks at herself in the mirror for at least a minute and her pupils don’t dilate
- She wants sweet things like candy, fruit, and juice
- If she ties her wedding ring to a string and hangs it over her stomach, and it swings side to side
- If you add her age at time of conception to the number of the month you conceived in and it’s odd
- Her hair is thinner and duller than normal
The truth is that you’ve got a 50/50 chance of your baby being male or female using any of these theories.
Conclusion
When you’re trying to have a baby, it seems like suddenly everyone in your life has advice about what you should do. Some of them are true and will actually help. While others are myths that will do nothing and could actually hurt your chances of conceiving.
When it comes to trying to have a baby, the best thing a couple can do is exercise, eat healthy, and get proper sleep. Along with not trying to have a baby too late in life, and consistently having sex in the time before and during ovulation.
Do you have any other conception or pregnancy myths that I missed? Or do you swear by one of the things I listed in this article as being false? Let me know in the comments below.
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